Funny Candles That Make the Perfect Gift

Hand-poured • 70+ hour burn time • Over 1,000 designs

Shop Bestsellers Customize Candle

Our Candles are amazing

100 % organic and vegan

Our scented candles are vegan and made from organic soy wax. None of our products have or ever will be tested on animals.

handmade with loving care

Our candles are handmade with the utmost care. Every candle – and every fragrance – is unique.

Natural ingredients only

We only use natural ingredients, with high-quality essential oils and the very best herbs.

Ultra long burn time

Since we use only the finest soy wax, candle guy candles burn for over 70 hours.

Most popular candles

Bestseller

I love you for your personality. But that dick is a huge bonus.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

Thanks for all the orgasms.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

Cocaine & Hookers

$ 24.90
Bestseller

I Love Your Face Especially When It’s In Between My Legs

$ 24.90
Bestseller

Light me when you want a BJ.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

I fucking love you and I love fucking you.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

I like you for your personality. But that dick is a huge bonus.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

You’re my favorite thing to do.

$ 24.90

When this candle is lit lick my clit.

$ 24.90
Bestseller

I’d bury a bitch for you.

$ 24.90

I can see you cumming in my hair tonight.

$ 24.90

When this candle is lit give me that dick.

$ 24.90
Personalized candle with custom text “[YOUR TEXT]”

Create Your Own Custom Candle

Create your candle with your own custom message — whether it’s an inside joke, a heartfelt note, or something you’ve always wanted to say. Ready in minutes and perfect as a gift or for special moments.

  1. Choose your favorite scent
  2. Add your custom text
  3. Done
See your candle instantly
Created in minutes
Ready to ship within 24 hours
Create Your Candle

The Best Place to Get a Funny Candle

Get Funny Candle News & Exclusive Offers

JOIN OUR NEWSLETTER AND GET $5 OFF!

Sign up to receive email updates on new products, gift ideas, special promotions, sales and more.

Why People Love Our Funny Candles



Trustpilot

Funny Candles That Actually Smell Amazing

Sea Salt & Orchid

You are lying on the beach. Waves crash in the background while the soft, warm [...]

Blanc

Not a cloud in the sky and no wind. No human being in the streets. [...]

White Sage & Lavender

It’s summer in the south of France, and the lavender fields are blooming in Provence. [...]

Fir Balsam

sense of peace envelops you. “N° 3 Cypress & Bayberry” features notes of cypress, moss, [...]

Clean Cotton

The luxury of slipping into a freshly-made bed. The comforting aroma of linen-dried sheets on [...]

About the King of Funny Candles

Michael Murphy, founder of Candle Guy, sitting next to a table with handmade scented candles featuring cheeky quotes in glass jars.

I am the original candle guy.

Time and again, people ask me how I came up with the idea for candle guy. The story is simple: I saw a scented candle in my apartment and wondered “Why can’t that candle be like me? “Sexy, environmentally-focused, appealing to the senses, and the right combination of funny and inappropriate. From there, candle guy was born.

If you have any question or feedback feel free to contact me!

Michael James Murphy
Contact Learn more

New Funny Candles Just Dropped

Proud mom of a few dumbass kids

$ 24.90

World’s Best Farter (oops I meant Father)

$ 24.90

Hot Moms Club

$ 24.90

MOM / WOW

$ 24.90

Awesome People Make Awesome Babies

$ 24.90

Dad, please light this when you fart.

$ 24.90

Mom, thanks for sharing your DNA. Now we’re both bitches.

$ 24.90

Children are like farts… you can only tolerate your own.

$ 24.90